Re-editing

A friend o'mine wrote:

I saw something on TV that had me scratching my head. I've been studying HOUSE for a spec.

My TiVo recorded this week's episode twice. Once on Global and once again on a FOX affiliate on the west coast. As I was watching and re-watching this episode at different times - making note of things like the different sets used, how the new characters were being integrated into the A, B, and C stories, and how much screen time everyone seems to get - I happened to switch between the two recordings of this same show.

Now while the U.S. recording followed the show's scripted teaser and subsequent four-act structure with commercials inserted at the proper times, the airing on Global created it's own act break midway through the fourth act creating its own fifth act. I was actually able to pause just before the commercials started to see a FADE TO DIGITAL SNOW as if someone in the control room hit PAUSE.

1. Is it common practice in Canada to add commercials in the middle of an act where they do not belong?

God, I hope not.

2. Do you think this kind of thing breaks up the flow of a show?

Ch'yeah.

TV writers spend a lot of time on their act outs. After a springboard is approved, the first document you might do would be a "breakdown" of the acts and their outs, before anybody writes an outline. That's how basic the act structure is.

An extra act-out where there's no cliffhanger or emotional moment is jarring. Coming near the climax, it derails the whole episode emotionally.

I've written elsewhere about the re-editing of THE TUDORS and what that did to the flow of the episode. It sounds like here again, no writer was involved in picking the moment to go out on -- and possibly no creative editor, either.

Re-editing for secondary markets (such as Canada) and syndication is a fact of life. That's why DVD sales, iTunes downloads, and even to a lesser extent free, ad-based streaming on the Internet, are a nice benefit of advancing technology: you see the episode the way it was planned, sometimes even in higher picture quality (with DVDs).

The Fire in the Sky

Shoe on the Other Foot

My pay cable series has been greenlit for more development -- scripts 4, 5 and 6. (I've already turned in the pilot, 2 and 3.) And I've been authorized to put together a small writing room to help break the rest of the season.

It's an interesting experience. I've hired writers before. And I've supervised writers before. But right now, we're looking for two top drama writers -- which means lots of the people I've been looking at have more experience than I do. Some of them are a bit older than me, too.

Suddenly, I understand why people get nervous hiring writers older than they are, because I'm nervous. One doesn't want to be disrespectful, but then one also doesn't want to have to defer to the other writer just because they're older -- or more experienced. It is after all your show.

It was an interesting process, going through the resumes. I kept going back to my own resume to see how it reads. Not all credits help you. I rejected some people with years of experience because their experience was all the same: procedural, procedural, procedural. My show is not a procedural. I'm more interested in someone who's staffed on a procedural, but also written a movie or two, and developed their own comedy pilot.

You want to avoid getting pigeonholed. I've become kind of a comedy writer of late. Unless I only want to get comedy work, I've got to change pace. Fortunately, this series is a metaphysical drama, so it shows range.

I find I don't always absorb credits well past the first page. You want all the impressive stuff on the first page; even better if there is only the one page. So I took off all my less-than-impressive credits. I've written or helped develop or produce some pretty unspectacular movies. Better to write "selected features" and "selected TV" and only include the good stuff, I think: the hit film, the series I co-created, the Head Writer gig, the directors I've written for.

I also find that the people I like wow me in the first five pages of their samples, with fresh, distinct characters and situations. The merely competent establish a situation with stock characters. The fresh writers don't always structure their screenplays well -- the screenplay may not deliver on the promise of the first five -- but if there isn't something distinctive in the first five, there isn't going to be in the rest of the script.

Now we're waiting on network approval for our development budget. Stay tuned!

Outline, Synopsis, Pitch, Treatment

Q. I've received a positive response from a film company regarding a query for my new script. They want to see a one-page outline before receiving the script. Not wanting to put a foot wrong, I was wondering if you could define the outline vs. synopsis.

An outline usually implies something you're planning to write.

A synopsis is usually a summary of what you've written. In practice the terms are used both ways, along with "pitch" and "treatment."

A pitch is an outline written as a sales document. Typically it's heavier on the setup, and may entirely gloss over the finale. You write a pitch to get people to read your script -- if they insist on one. If producers ask for a synopsis, always send a pitch.

A treatment is an outline written as the first stage of a commissioned script. There is no functional difference between an outline and a treatment. Often you have to write a pitch to get a producer interested, or to get a funding agency to cough up the dough. You are not allowed to write a treatment without getting paid. There's a bit of contradiction there, but what can you do.

New Management Company

I just got this from Tim Lambert:

I work for Abbot Management- a Screenplay Management and Representation Company. We currently employ 15 Readers and do something unique in the entertainment industry - in that we always share with writers who submit material to us the coverages that we recieve on their work. Everyday we are sending out multiple packets to screenwriters saying something along the lines of - I'm sorry Alex, we're passing on your work, however I'm attaching the 4 coverages we recieved on your script so you can see what our readers felt worked / didnt work in your material.

I feel that its an incredibly valuable resource to screenwriters - and I was hoping that you would consiter adding a link to our website, www.abbotmanagement.com, on your page.

Tim promises me that they will never charge a coverage fee, so this is a pretty good service. If they sell your stuff, they get a cut. They have what they feel is a new approach to database technology:

We've been around approxomitly Four months - and for the the past three months we have been working with a team of database programers who have been building us a pretty radical content management system complete with a readers / screenwriters / buyers / and administrator login. Among other things, it allows us to sort by every screenplay that fits certain criteria - ex: low budget horror - and will display loglines, coverages etc. We then have a database of producers / production companies that three individuals have been working full time for there months putting together - and using this database we're able to sort by, for example, production companies that make low budget horror.

I'm not endorsing this company, as they haven't even gone "live" yet, so they have no track record. But you may be interested in hearing their feedback...

Lionsgate, Marvel Sign Deals

Lionsgate and Marvel Studios have both signed the WGA interim deal.

The strike is working. The cracks in the studio dam are spreading. With each of these deals, it becomes harder for the remaining studios to stay at home in bed while the other kiddies are out in the playground playing. Each of these deals puts pressure on the AMPTP side in the "informal negotiations" now going on. (And is it possible that "informal" means "Nick Counter, sit down and shut up, we need to make a deal now"?)

If you're in the WGA, I think the message is clear: hold out, you're winning. Don't snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Stay strong. Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose.

Toronto/LA

Q. I'm about to start looking for an agent, but as I'm Canadian and want to (eventually) write for US shows, I'm trying to determine a course of action. I read on one of your previous posts that a Toronto agent can't get you work in LA, so would I get both a Toronto agent and an LA-based agent? Is that possible? And can I get an LA agent without being in LA? Hypothetically if I did get one, I'd be OK with taking the occasional trip there for meetings, but since I'm Canadian I'd need a Green Card to actually move there. I assume that if I did get some US credits first, an LA-based company would be more likely to sponsor me moving there.

You really need to decide whether you want to start in LA, or Canada.

The most important resource you have is your writing ability and your scripts. Your second most important resource is your connections. If you make Canadian connections, they won't help you in LA. I've got a reputation up here; down there no one knows me. If I were to go down to LA after the strike, I might get some polite attention, but I'd have to spend serious time down there to get to know people who might want to hire me. I'd probably be lucky to get work as a writer-producer staffing a show. A good friend of mine has occasionally thought about going down to LA to try his luck; he would actually move there for a year to see if he can break in. An "occasional trip" won't cut it.

At a bare minimum you could get an LA agent in one trip, and then come down later for staffing season, but you would need to spend all of staffing season in LA.

LA credits will definitely help you in Canada, but you still won't know anybody. So pick the market you want to work in.

It is generally easier to break in in Canada, provided of course that you are Canadian.

I don't know how you get working papers in the States, since I've never had to do it, but there is a whole community of expat Canucks in LA, so it must be possible. Anyone want to weigh in?

Q. Well, which do I do? I'm a feature writer. Do I move down there asap as soon as I have a couple scripts under my belt (written, not sold)? Do I write until I sell something, and THEN move to LA? Do I try to get a movie made in LA while writing in Toronto?

If you're a feature writer, it's less urgent to move to LA. You can get a feature agent without living in LA. You'll be missing the meetings with development people, but those never turn into anything anyway until you've sold a script.

On the other hand, you learn a lot from being in LA. You absorb a sense of showbiz. If you work in an agency as an assistant, you get a sense of the biz. If you work on a set, you get a sense of the biz.

Canada's more nurturing, but it's a kiddie pool compared to LA. If you like to swim in the ocean, and don't mind undertow and sharks, go to LA. If you want swimming lessons, and a lifeguard, stay in Canada.

There's no right answer. People come out of the Canadian Film Centre and start working in the Canadian biz, and make a good career here. People go to LA and become Jim Cameron. People go to LA, spend 5 years, can't get arrested, lose their dog in the divorce, come back, and are big successes because they absorbed a work ethic and creative standards that blow the competition away. People go to LA, fail, and become embittered real estate agents in San Berdardino.

You gotta ask yourself a question ... "do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya?

A Revised First Draft Walks Into a Bar

You turn in your draft. The producer gives you notes. You turn in a revised draft.

From time to time, a producer will assert that the second draft you turned in is a "revised first draft," not a second draft. Your producer may truly believe himself. But his belief, not inconsequentially, means he doesn't owe you a second draft payment.

Here's the reality:

Q. A revised first draft, a devout Muslim and the Easter Bunny walk into a bar. One of them orders a drink. Who is it?
A. The devout Muslim. The other two don't exist.

Which is how the WGA and WGC contracts work. If the producer (or the director, or the producer's development assistant, on his orders) gives you notes and you revise, that's a second draft.

That doesn't mean I only revise things once. I'm a team player. I can't tell you how many times I've revised the pilot of the show I'm developing. And if I send in a draft and then fool around with it without producer or network notes, and send it in again, I never consider that a new draft.

But I expect to be paid for the two drafts that are in my contract before I do any free tinkering. Otherwise who's to say when you finally get to a second draft? Principal photography? Whenever the producer is in a jolly mood? Whenever he has some spare money burning a hole in his pocket?

This is one of the reasons I stick closely to my union. The first time a producer pulled this on me, I wasn't in the union, and I was out 20% of the contract. Which was for $1000. Yes, they stiffed me for $200! Since joining the Guild, God bless them, I've had admirable help 'splainin' the nature of a second draft.

Producers will sometimes tell you, "That may be what's in the contract but everyone revises their drafts for free." My impression is that the standard of the industry is this: you are paid for a draft and a set, meaning a draft and a set of revisions. Many writers will rewrite the draft quite a bit beyond the set, without asking for additional payments, unless they're on a weekly. But there are no free revisions until the paid revisions are exhausted. The paid revisions come first.

How can you avoid this awkward situation cropping up? Make sure there's a "paper" trail.

When you start writing a treatment, send your producer an email saying "I'm really excited to be starting the treatment for GO POSTAL." When you email in your treatment, make sure the subject line says "GO POSTAL treatment" and that the text says "here's my treatment for GO POSTAL." Don't use writer terms like beat sheet or step outline or synopsis. An outline does not trigger a payment. Use the term in your contract, which in a Guild contract is "treatment."

When you start writing your first draft, send an email saying, "Okay, I'm starting my first draft, wish me luck!" If you don't get a positive answer right away, you might want to send an email saying: "Um, should I start now?" and make sure you get a positive answer.

And when you turn in your first draft, write, "Here's my first draft of GO POSTAL!"

Don't say ANYTHING in that email about how there might be further work to do, or it's not perfect, or apologize in any way for your first draft. You might cause your producer to expect you to revise your first draft for free. Keep your own notes to yourself, if you have them; let your producer bring his notes. I always make more revisions than the producer's notes, trying to improve things even if he thought they were good enough.

When you start the second draft, send in an email saying, "Great notes, thank you. I am starting my second draft now." Make sure you get a positive response.

While none of this will protect you from a truly unscrupulous producer, there are far fewer of those than there are producers with a slightly self-serving point of view. Clear communication and a paper trail will help eliminate any confusion that might exist in your producer's mind. It is very hard later on for a producer to maintain he didn't know you were writing a second draft when you have a copy of your email to him that says "I'm starting my second draft." If you're clear, the question may never come up at all. And then everyone's happy.

In both stories and contracts, clarity makes for a smoother ride for everyone.