Eddie

Here's the trailer from EDDIE: THE SLEEPWALKING CANNIBAL, a fine black comedy I story edited. It's about a has-been artist, Lars, who starts taking care of a deaf-mute with a habit of killing and eating small animals while sleepwalking. Strangely, Lars finds himself inspired to paint for the first time in years.

So Lars pushes Eddie to go further.

It's pretty twisted. Sort of ART SCHOOL CONFIDENTIAL with, you know, cannibalism.

It's fun working on a piece like this. Your job as story editor is sometimes to reassure the filmmaker that his most demented instincts are right on -- you're the voice going, "Yes, that is seriously effed up. Now go for it." Because no one wants a cannibalistic art satire that pulls its punches.

Lisa and I got a similar note a few months back on our dark drama ALICE FOUND ALIVE. It was a few too many things at once, and a wise producer suggested we carve it down to its freshest and scariest impulses. Once you cross certain lines, you can't look back.

Eddie is premiering at the Tribeca Film Festival. Here's an early review.

Kids

I listened to an interesting Fresh Air interview with Francis Coppola. Among many interesting things he said, he encourages filmmakers to get married and have kids early. He says that yes, kids take up a lot of time. But when you have a family, you focus much harder on getting stuff done than when you're a carefree single guy going out on dates.

I will confirm that I did not get more written before I had kids. Having kids forces you to be serious about your work.

Technically, Coppola only urges male filmmakers to get married; he urges female filmmakers to stay single, so they don't have to take care of some guy and his kids. But he's from another generation. There is no reason that a female filmmaker can't marry someone who will take care of her and her kids.

The Obligatory Scene

I started rewatching BAND OF BROTHERS because I've been rereading Churchill's history of World War II. ("History will not be kind to Neville Chamberlain," Churchill said. "I know, for I shall write the history.")

Just watched episode 3, "Carentan." And there's a particularly brilliant scene that sums up all the carnage that Easy Company has been through.

(Spoilers, obviously, though just regarding the scene.)

What's brilliant about it is that it doesn't come during any of the battles. It's not a moment after the battle, surveying all the men lying on the field. You expect that after a battle scene. No, it comes when Easy is back in England after being pulled off the line in Normandy. They're going back to the war, so Sgt. Malarkey goes up to pick up his laundry.

He pays the woman -- he doesn't know what to make of English money, so she just picks the coins out of his hand. And he's about to leave, when she asks if he knows a certain Lieutenant, who hasn't come by to pick up his laundry. And we can see from Sgt. Malarkey's face why the Lieutenant hasn't come by. But he pays for the laundry. And then the wash woman asks about a few more soldiers from Easy who haven't been in to pick up their laundry. And she calls off their names. And of course she's naming the dead. And there are a lot of them.

It hits you harder because you're not expecting it. You don't expect to meet death when you're safely picking up your laundry.

I've heard the phrase "the obligatory scene" a few times. It's the scene that goes with the territory. The scene that the audience knows it has to see or they won't have a complete experience. As a writer, you try to figure out how to write that scene so that it's fresh and convincing and surprising, not merely obligatory.

The all-time most amazing obligatory scene I've ever seen, I think, is in ROME. It comes after Caesar's murder. Marc Antony has to give a speech, you see.

The problem is, he's going to give a speech that another writer has written rather memorably. "Friends, Romans, countrymen," it begins. "Lend me your ears. I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him."

How do you rewrite Shakespeare?

You don't, of course. And what the screenwriter of that episode chose to do, instead, was to have a fellow come into a bar and tell everyone about Antony's speech. Of course he doesn't remember the words. He barely heard them. He talks about how Antony came out with Caesar's bloody toga, and kissed it, and how he played the crowd.

The writing fills in around the famous speech. It's like jazz: you don't hit the beat, you hit around the beat, trusting the audience knows where the beat is.

The audience of BAND OF BROTHERS knows where the beat is. It knows where the dead are. They're lying in the hedgerows of Normandy. So you don't talk about death there. You talk about fear, and fearlessness, and fatigue, and stupid mistakes, and cowardice, and hysterical blindness. You talk about everything except death.

And then after the beat, you play that note -- afterwards, you have your obligatory scene.

Where Are Your Papers?

Gavin Polone's piece about "Who Really Determines the Fates of Aspiring Screenwriters" is of course worth reading in its entirety, but I'll just draw attention to his comment that no one reads paper scripts any more. "Everyone reads on iPads and Kindles." So disregard anything you may read in old books (including my own) about how to send a script on paper. Thankfully, no one wants to read it on paper.

Similar Project

Q. A producer wants to read my script. But he says he's got a similar project, and he wants me to sign a release form.

Normally I wouldn't worry about signing a release form. It's just something you have to do.

And normally I wouldn't stress if a producer said they had a similar project. Lots of people have similar projects. Most don't get made.

But I would not be particularly anxious to send my script to a producer who said he had a similar project, and wanted me to sign a release form. There's just too much temptation for him to steal whatever he likes from my script and apply it to his project. Indeed it would be hard not to. And the release form would in that case protect him against any claim you might have.

And if he's already got one project, he probably is not going to toss out the one he's worked on, and buy yours. So there isn't a lot of upside.

So I would "count to ten on that."

And Ten From Michael Caine

1) When speaking to an actor off-camera, look into one eye and stick with it.

2) Film acting is, in large part, reacting and listening.

3) While rehearsing something with a fellow actor, if a crew member can come up and recognize you’re rehearsing vs. having a real conversation, then you aren’t doing it right.

4) An actor relaxes in front of the camera by concentrating, and knowing that you have no enemies on set, everyone’s on your side and doing their best to make you look your best for the movie.

5) The camera catches everything you do, so don’t be afraid to play things subtley.

6) If you’re going to smoke on-screen, you must plan it absolutely perfectly, don’t mess up the continuity.

7) All actors steal certain gestures and behaviors from other actors — but the best actors make these gestures their own. Steal from the best, and make it your own.

8) You can make four pictures as an actor in the time it takes a director to make one — so if you’re an actor planning on becoming a director, consider the financial aspect.

9) A majority of movie acting is relaxation. If you’re knocking yourself out, you’re doing it wrong.

10) Theater acting is an operation with a scalpel, movie acting is an operation with a laser.

From Nofilmschool

Billy Wilder's Notes for Writers

1. The audience is fickle.
   
2. Grab ‘em by the throat and never let ‘em go.
   
3. Develop a clean line of action for your leading character.
   
4. Know where you’re going.
   
5. The more subtle and elegant you are in hiding your plot points, the better you are as a writer.
   
6. If you have a problem with the third act, the real problem is in the first act.
   
7. A tip from Lubitsch: Let the audience add up two plus two. They’ll love you forever.
   
8. In doing voice-overs, be careful not to describe what the audience already sees. Add to what they’re seeing.
   
9. The event that occurs at the second act curtain triggers the end of the movie.
   
10. The third act must build, build, build in tempo and action until the last event, and then -
    
11. - that’s it. Don’t hang around.

Via The Uncool

Everyone Talks About the Weather...

"Everyone talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it" -- Mark Twain

Reader Eitan L helpfully writes in to give me a heads up that today is the last day to apply for the Weather Channel Writers Fellowship, which "is recognized as the premier diversity writers program in the television weather reporting industry."

If you're interested in creative writing about the weather, don't hesitate to apply to this highly prestigious program.